Tuesday

Finished my morning devotions. Now I'm waiting to go to Bible class we have it every Tuesday morning for women. Miles stayed home from work again today I'm really worried that it's starting all over again. I'm praying for him. I may call my al-anon sponsor for some support later.

Bible class was good. We're studying a book called Beautiful Battlefields, written by a woman named Bo Stern. She is a Christian woman whose husband has ALS and she teaches how to live through battles we go through in life. Its helping me go through problems with Miles.

Valerie called Mike a little while ago and he said he doesn't think miles is drinking but he is acting dizzy. I don't know what to think he could be just covering up for his brother. But miles isn't answering his phone or texts and that's how he acts when he's drinking so I don't know what to think now.

Its 8:30 p.m. and I still haven't heard from Miles. I've been studying Step 1, "we admitted that we were powerless over alcohol-that our lives had become unmanageable." Step 1 teaches that we didn't cause it, we can't control it, and we can't cure it. We have to learn to let go and let them make their choices and take the consequences. But I feel so guilty and feel constant dread about what might be happening.

I got my Bible reading and study but didn't get much else done. I'll try again tomorrow. I've got to get into the habit of exercising in the morning; otherwise I want get it done.